Episode 78: This Infinite Nothing

We’re missing the Texas-bound Brandon tonight, but Patrick Donnelly (@donnelly612) stepped in for him and did his usual fine New Ulm job. Among tonight’s topics:

  • The latest Gopher football letdown, and just how much of a letdown it really is
  • Jon accidentally locking his wife out of the house during the podcast and how this was endlessly hilarious to Stu
  • The Mitch Moss Sports Toilet’s ongoing feud with Marty Cordova (NOTE: alternate title for this episode was “Feuding with Marty Cordova”)
  • Clarence’s audio slideshow of his trip to Nashville
  • The Wolves lost! (NOTE: This is a transcription of all of the Wolves talk.)
  • The ninth inning of Game 7 of the World Series, poorly broadcasted
  • The Wild power play and why they just won’t listen to us
  • A Vikings win nobody cares about, following a tortured sports metaphor
  • Patrick Donnelly direct quote: “I don’t know, I’m not in your brains.”
  • Michael Russo = kd lang

In other words, the usual to-the-point sports talk you’ve come to expect.

Episode 75: Watch Out For Finns

It’s a hockey preview episode of the Sportive this week, as Clarence joined Jon at Sportive HQ to talk Wild and Gopher puck for an entire episode. Brandon was not allowed to attend. Stu called in.

In between a pretty detailed breakdown of the Wild and a somewhat less detailed breakdown of the Gophers, we managed to talk about such topics as:

  • Finns are the orneriest people on earth
  • Living in Madison, MN
  • Fargo in March: the Venice of the North
  • Farm permits
  • Dickinson, ND

Plus, at the end, Stu and Clarence make a real live bet.

Episode 59: You Leave Bob Out Of This

Brandon was out of town this week, so we turned to Emergency Podcast Guest (and Jon’s brother) Dave Marthaler to fill in with the rest of the gang.

After Dave confirmed that the podcast is not, in fact, just Jon sitting around a table with a bunch of stuffed animals, imitating their voices, he joined in the talk about some and perhaps all of the following:

  • The Vikings draft (which was like a month ago, but we haven’t recorded a podcast in awhile)
  • Speculating on what Brandon might think about Kevin Love
  • The end of the Wild season
  • Gopher football
  • Are the Gophers better off than they have been in years, overall as an athletic department?
  • Landon Donovan being left off the USA’s World Cup roster

There was some other stuff in there, too. It got strange at times, not least because both Marthalers sound the exact same.

Episode 52: The David Backes Drawing Card

Brandon didn’t make it this week, and neither did our planned guest, and so Stu, Clarence and Jon were left to discuss whatever happened to float through their heads. That included:

  • Glen Perkins being the most One of Us person since Kent Hrbek
  • Whether Aaron Hicks should begin the season at Triple-A
  • Pretending to care about Vikings free agency
  • What to burn if the Vikings don’t take a quarterback in the draft
  • Clarence firing everyone associated with the Wild (it led to a 6-0 win)
  • If Gopher hockey wins a conference championship and nobody cares, does it make a sound?
  • Jon getting progressively more worked up as Clarence disagrees with all of his points about college hockey
  • Stu zoning out and naming his best Steely Dan song ever
  • Whether Justified or The Americans is a better show
  • Terrible March Madness picks

In other words: A pretty typical bunch of nonsense.

Episode 46: Gleeman, Bonnes, and the bar

For this week’s Sportive, we actually got out of the house and recorded at a bar, Gleeman and the Geek style – so we figured that we might as well invite Aaron and John on the podcast, as well.

We talked about whether becoming more mainstream had changed anything for the two of them. We also tried to find out if John likes anything besides baseball and Aaron likes anything besides whiskey.

There must have been a few other things discussed, because we went for way over an hour. I can’t remember most of them, but I do recall that towards the end, Stu quits listening to what we’re saying and starts participating in bar trivia. It’s delightful.

The Christmas Episode

Two days after Christmas, we all went over to Aaron Gleeman‘s house and recorded a podcast. Because of the noise, and the echoes in Aaron’s unfurnished basement, the result is virtually unlistenable, but we had an excellent time doing it. Brandon was actually in the studio for once, Stu was in fine form, and Jon was wearing headphones for some reason for the whole time. Also, thanks to the following people for being guests:

Please pardon this disaster, and merry Christmas!

UPDATED: The Top 25 Minnesota Towns That Sound Like Sex Acts

During Episode 28, we went through our Top 25 list of Minnesota towns and cities that sound the most like sex acts. Here’s that list… with a couple of updates.

ALSO RECEIVING VOTES: Dilworth, Chisholm, Little Canada, Embarrass

25. Good Thunder
24. Beaver Creek
23. Shorewood
22. Felton
21. Cold Spring
20. Kiester
19. Fertile
18. Golden Valley
17. Hardwick
16. Woodbury
15. Rush City
14. Deephaven
13. Mounds View
12. Cannon Falls
11. Climax
10. Grand Rapids
9. West Union
8. Greenbush
7. Two Harbors
6. Browns Valley
5. Fountain
4. Remer
3. Hackensack
2. Sleepy Eye
1. Moorhead

On behalf of all of us here at The Sportive: We’re sorry for what we have done.

Episode 31: Braveheart and an Irish Childhood

We’re one man short this week, but Clarence, Jon, and Stu got together to talk about the following:

  • How depressing the Vikings are
  • How depressing the Twins are
  • How depressing it is that Terry Ryan doesn’t understand what things cost
  • How depressing the outdoor hockey situation is
  • How depressed should we be about the Wild?

It’s not all bad, though. We do talk about Val’s in St. Cloud, and encourage all listeners to send strange mail to Mike Rand.

Please, click below and have a listen.


Episode 22: Please Stand By

What you are (hopefully) about to download is effectively two episodes stiched together – a Frankenepisode, if you will. Basically, we started recording with Brian Stensaas, got about 20 minutes in, and then the computer died. We later recovered the data from the crash, but by that time it was two days later, so Stu and Jon recorded another 40 minutes and grafted that onto the end of the original episode.

We are not good at this.

We talk British Open and Wild with Clarence and Brian, then Twins and Timberwolves with Stu and I, and it’s all a little disjointed.

I would say bear with us because it’ll be better next week, but past experience says that’s just not something we can promise.

The Sportive After Dark

We’ve promised this episode a few times, but it’s finally here (by which we mean our planning was finally bad enough that we don’t have an actual episode this week.) Every so often, we stick around and shoot the breeze after the podcast is actually over, and sometimes we remember to record it. This episode is an amalgamation of three of these – following episodes 10, 11, and 17. You’ll hear guests Parker HagemanJesse Lund, and Ladonna, along with the usual crew. Among other things, we talk about:

  • The history of the podcast
  • DiamondCentric moonshine
  • A Rosemount pub crawl (which later became the genesis of #StearnsCountyPartyBus)
  • Bad weather and the Legends club
  • How the mixer actually works
  • Burger ratings
  • Abe Lincoln and slavery
  • The two worst Bill Clinton impressions of all time

We hope to be back next week, but if you listen to this podcast, you know that nothing we say can ever be trusted.

Oh yeah, and a reminder to iSubscribe on iTunes with your iDevice.